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Since it has been so long since I have blogged about my kids I thought I would start a little series where I dedicate a post to each child separately and list five specific hopes that I have for each one.
I'll start with Patience as she is the oldest, certainly not because she is the nicest to me (which she is).
Dear Patience,
Thank you so much for making me a mama, and thank you endlessly for being patient with me while I learn to grow and fill that role. You are beautiful, forgiving, incredibly clever, funny, and you remind me that angels are real.
I hope that you realize exactly how lovely you are, but never learn to depend on it. I mean go ahead and leverage it a little bit, but just know that you are so much more than the shell that holds your soul. I try so hard to balance how often I complement your appearance and style with how often I tell you that you are smart and so incredibly well spoken! When people meet you they are blown away by your brain and your wit and I wish wish wish that you feel as proud as I do about who you are, and not what just what you look like, you gorgeous girl you.
I hope that you always love exercising and growing your mind as much as you do now. I think that the drive you have to learn, and the work ethic you have to succeed in learning, are amazing! I want to feed that fire and keep you excited to read and do experiments and investigate when you don't know some thing. You can have so much fun exploring this world baby girl, and I am so excited to do it with you!
I hope that you learn to be kind to yourself. At just six years old you strive to be the best at anything you do, and I have seen you be very hard on yourself when you don't feel like you have succeeded. Baby, be nice to yourself, and know that trying your best is the most that you can do. It is ok to be happy with yourself and where you are at, while still trying to improve and continue doing your best. I am always so proud of you and you should be proud of you too!
I hope that your heart stays gentle and brave. Your little heart has already been through so much confusion and change yet it remains open and loving and and sweet girl, that is so brave. I see that you revel in the happiness of others and love to shower affection onto the people that you care about (which is pretty much everyone you meet). I know that I can't always protect your heart, but I hope hope hope that whatever else life throws at you your spirit doesn't change. A heart like yours is a gift to everyone it touches.
I hope that you learn to let things be and let things go. As sweet and loving as you are Patience, you can also take it really hard when something doesn't go the way you hoped or planned. I've watched you struggle through a grudge match with another little girl for months before you could let go of whatever argument started it. Trust me girl, I get it. You come from a long long line of grudge holders, but it made me sad to see you struggle and be upset over something started by a small slight. Time that you could have spent laughing and having fun was spent in frustration. Stand up for yourself and fight for what you want, but baby, sometimes it just is what it is and you can move on.
Of course I have much much more to say to you about how I hope you treat the world and how I hope the world treats you, but I will stop here for now. I can't wait to pick you up from school today and hear all about the kindergarten drama and watch your sweet animated face shine with excitement. I think I'll even turn the radio up louder than usual for you when one of your jams comes on.
Love you Star Stuff.